Students

So, yesterday was the last class day of the fall semester at the school that I teach at. Kind of surreal that this will be my last year of teaching. When I got to school yesterday I decided that I was going to give my level 3 students a day that they could chill or study if they needed to, because most of them were exempt from my final exam anyway. During my first class I was able to just sit and talk with some of my students. As I did so, I felt God impressing them upon my heart. Each of my students are faced with so many emotions, and situations that they have no idea how to handle. My heart aches for them because I don't even know how I would handle the situations they face everyday with out the Lord. Words don't even come close when describing how much I care about the students I work with. They are my kids...my kids. I want them to succeed in life...I don't want to see them struggling to find acceptance, searching for love in the wrong places, or looking at themselves in a negative way. I look at each one of my students and I see their need for the love and acceptance, not from people here on earth, but from the only one who can satisfy those desires. Jesus Christ, the Savior of the world, the One who desires a personal relationship with with each of us. This relationship is another thing that is extremely hard to put into words. It is not just a casual relationship, or one that we only partake in when we need something. The relationship that Christ desires to have with us is suppose to be so intimate that the relationship between a husband and wife is suppose to be just a glimpse of the one we have with Christ. He is jealous to have that kind of relationship with all of my students, a satisfying relationship. Again like the woman at the well...she will thirst no more. As I type this, the Lord lays it on my heart that the care I have for my students, is just a glimmer of what He feels for me. He sees the big picture. He sees my desires and completely understands my emotions. He also sees everything I try to use to ignore and satisfy all the things I feel. Jesus looks at me and everything that surrounds my situation and says "I love you. Catherine, drink from the water that I give and you will never thirst again." It is so hard though...I don't know how to drink from His well...to find satisfaction in Him. Sometimes I just want to get away. I want to have a retreat with God...apart from all the distractions of satan.
I don't know...I guess I am just rambling now. So many things...others, feelings, Christ. Trying to figure out how to reconcile it all...