This Year

Well...The year is almost over, and true to what I wanted this year has been a year full of change. I think this year can be coined by the phrase "2 steps forward 1 step back", in fact some days it has seemed like I have taken 3 steps back instead of just 1, but the through it all the Lord has been faithful. I am constantly amazed at His steadfast abiding love that calls me to be closer to Him. SOO much has happened that last 8 months, it has been a whirlwind that I haven't even had the words to put it all down. I am going to attempt to give you a brief overview...

Well first of all in February I gave into God's calling to go to Africa on a mission trip with my church and E3 Partners. I had been feeling that I was suppose to go for a few months, and even a weirder feeling that I was suppose to stay, but since I had NEVER wanted to do that I stayed open to the idea, but assumed that I would not go much less want to stay. Well I finally signed up to go on 2 trips which would last May 5-May 28th. As I fundraised I was amazed and blessed when people gave...God provided the $5000 required to go on the day it was due. I was even able to take the days off I needed from work. God worked it all out so there was no question in my mind I was suppose to go. I still thought in my mind that I would have a hard time being in another country and would be ready to go home after just a few days. Finally came the day we were leaving. After the two 9 hour flights (one from DFW to Amsterdam, then Amsterdam to Kilamangaro) I was finally in Africa. As soon as I got off the plane on to the runway I expected to have culture shock and be ready to go home, but surprisingly I didn't. We had arrived after dark, so we then piled in a bus with all of our luggage and drove about 1 hour to where we would stay the night...still nothing.
The next day as I looked out the window of our hotel to see the city we had stayed in that night in the light,



I had a strange feeling...not of culture shock, or of being home sick like I expected...I couldn't even explain the feeling...except for PEACE...I knew this was where God wanted me to be. That morning we drove to buy Bibles written in Swahili we would use at our mission points. So we all piled back into the bus...as we drove my soul took in the sights of a people group that I would come to love.

We drove about another 2-3 hours to the city of Karatu, where we would end up staying for the next week. As we drove I kept trying to figure out how I felt in the place I was. I still couldn't put my finger on how I felt...then as I spent my time looking out across the beautiful land...

and it came to me...

I felt at home...this alone should have caused me to panic, but it didn't...I just remember the overwhelming peace of being in God's will.

When we finally arrived to Karatu the plans we had for that week completely changed. We were supposed to be camping among the Masai people and planting churches among nomadic tribes, but we had not yet received permission to do so by the government officials. So instead of working with the Masai, we worked with mission points in the area of Karatu where we were.

The next day I went out with my mission partner who happens to also be my singles pastor or as you say in Swahili my mchungaji. We got in the bus with a bunch of other people and after about 2-3 hours of insanely bumpy driving we arrived at the church we would work with that week.

It was humbling just to see where these people met for worship. After a round of introductions, and me figuring out how to go to the bathroom in Africa, we were on our way. We spent our days walking from hut to hut sharing the gospel.

People were very receptive and listen to what we had to say....

While all listened not all received, and at times it was hard because it felt like nothing was being done, but when I felt this I remember the Holy Spirit reassuring me, and telling me to just Trust and Obey. Just when I would be ready to stop, I would share and someone would receive and be saved.


We walked a lot, so we only went to like 4-5 huts per day, but many came to know Christ. This is a picture of one of the pastors and some of the women in the church. They were gracious enough to feed us everyday.

As I spent more time with these people the more God spoke to my heart. Everyday as I took in the poverty around me, I saw something I never had before. I saw zeal for the lost, and true worship in the midst of having very little. I saw hospitality, and caring, even when they had little. I saw people who were happy in the sight of the Lord, and I was convicted. Here I was in Africa among people who had very few things and lived in huts they made with their own hands, and I compared them with my life. As I did so I realized how much I depend on things, and being able to spend money for my identity. Growing up I never had much. I had to pay for my own things, and now that I am an adult I realised how I put my identity in having things. As I thought more about how much I had come to love these people and this place where I felt so at home, I was saddened when I remembered what I had holding me away from them....Debt. When I went to college and graduated with over $30,000 of student loans, I looked at the great commission as a good thing, but not for me, and I resigned to just be paying back my loans for 30 years. At this point however as my eyes were opened to the world I wanted so desperately to be able to say to God "I will go" and as I did I realized that I was chained to my debt. I could not go because I am slave to the lender. Before I had left on my trip I put a deposit down on an apartment that was significantly more than I had been paying, and I was so excited about being in a nice apt all by myself, but now as the wool had been pulled from my eyes my heart was grieved for all the money I had waisted. I was convicted to the core. As I was praying through what the Holy Spirit was reveling, The week was coming to a close. The last mission day that week we finally were able to go to the Masai trips and share the gospel with them. Here the conviction I had been feeling was cemented into my soul.

Here I was among people who lined their huts with cow dung for insulation. Where children had flies crawling around their eyes and mouths. Even though it seems like these people were adequately clothed, it was VERY cold and all most of the had were thin clothes and thin fabric that was used as blankets.

Most people didn't have shoes, and cow dung was everywhere.

In this picture you can see the shoes that were made from tires.

The whole village gathered around as we shared the gospel with them all. It was amazing to see their response, and even after how they worshiped the Lord.

I knew what I had to do when I came back home....my priorities had to be changed.

When the first week on mission was over I then went to a new area called Morongoro, and worked there at 2 mission points. I will write a post later about all that happened there, but I wanted to just give you an idea of how God moved in my heart.

When I came back home, I decided that I had to pay off my debt so I would no longer be slave to my debt. I did not move into the apartment I had put a deposit down on. When I moved out of my old apartment in June because my lease was up I went through all of my things and sold/donated probably about 75% of my things. It was so hard going through all of the things I had placed my identity in for so many years, but it was also liberating. Since June I have been living out of a suitcase, but God has always provided me a place to stay. I have been in and out of my parents house, and also house sitting and staying with friends in order to pay off debt.

It has been a long process and I have a long way to go, and many spending habits to break. This last fall I have been going through Financial Peace University with Dave Ramsey and learning how to live on a budget for the first time in my life. It has been hard, but so rewarding in that I am able to tithe and give like I never have before.

It has been hard and I have taken steps back in the process of handling my money, but God has been faithful in giving me reminders and refocusing my eyes and my heart on truth. One of those refocuses has come the last couple of months as my singles group have been studying the book Radical by David Platt. I read this book when I came back and started to make changes in my life, and as I am reading it again, my soul is renewed with the passion to be free from debt...and not do it in my own power but daily bringing it to the Lord, because that is what He has called me to do.

This last week as I read chapter 6 in this book entitled "American Wealth and a World of Poverty", I was refocused and reminded of the people I came across in Africa. Here are some startling facts from this chapter that remind me God has blessed me to bless others:

"More than 26 thousand children will die today due to starvation or a preventable disease. To put that into perspective, if this were happening among our community it would mean that every child 18 years or younger in our country would be dead within the next 2 days."

This grieves me...Does it grieve your heart?

What are you going to do about it?? Let this change you.

Don't forget...Jesus said in Matthew 25:


31“But when the Son of Man comes in His glory, and all the angels with Him, then He will sit on His glorious throne. 32“All the nations will be gathered before Him; and He will separate them from one another, as the shepherd separates the sheep from the goats; 33and He will put the sheep on His right, and the goats on the left.

34“Then the King will say to those on His right, ‘Come, you who are blessed of My Father, inherit the kingdom prepared for you from the foundation of the world. 35‘For I was hungry, and you gave Me something to eat; I was thirsty, and you gave Me something to drink; I was a stranger, and you invited Me in; 36naked, and you clothed Me; I was sick, and you visited Me; I was in prison, and you came to Me.’ 37“Then the righteous will answer Him, ‘Lord, when did we see You hungry, and feed You, or thirsty, and give You something to drink? 38‘And when did we see You a stranger, and invite You in, or naked, and clothe You? 39‘When did we see You sick, or in prison, and come to You?’ 40“The King will answer and say to them, ‘Truly I say to you, to the extent that you did it to one of these brothers of Mine, even the least of them, you did it to Me.’

41“Then He will also say to those on His left, ‘Depart from Me, accursed ones, into the eternal fire which has been prepared for the devil and his angels; 42for I was hungry, and you gave Me nothing to eat; I was thirsty, and you gave Me nothing to drink; 43I was a stranger, and you did not invite Me in; naked, and you did not clothe Me; sick, and in prison, and you did not visit Me.’ 44“Then they themselves also will answer, ‘Lord, when did we see You hungry, or thirsty, or a stranger, or naked, or sick, or in prison, and did not take care of You?’ 45“Then He will answer them, ‘Truly I say to you, to the extent that you did not do it to one of the least of these, you did not do it to Me.’ 46“These will go away into eternal punishment, but the righteous into eternal life.”

Will you feed and cloth Him? Will you invite Him in and give Him a drink?